The Argument Resolver

How to Play:

1. Recognize the Disagreement:
   The game begins when a disagreement or conflict arises among the group. This could be between children, family members, or friends. Rather than escalating the situation, the Story Spindle is used to facilitate a fair and peaceful resolution.

2. Assign the Story Spindle:
   One person (or a neutral facilitator) introduces the Story Spindle into the conversation. Whoever holds the Story Spindle has the "floor," meaning they are the only one allowed to speak at that moment. This encourages calmness and gives each person a chance to speak without being interrupted.

3. The First Speaker:
   The person holding the Story Spindle begins by explaining their point of view calmly and respectfully. They should focus on expressing their thoughts, feelings, and reasoning without blaming others. For example: “I feel upset because we agreed to clean up together, and I noticed the task was left unfinished. I feel like we need to work as a team.”

4. Passing the Spindle:
   Once the first person has finished speaking, they pass the Story Spindle to the next person. The next person must wait until they have the spindle in their hands before speaking. They now have the opportunity to share their perspective on the issue, doing so in the same calm, respectful manner. For example: “I understand that you’re frustrated, but I didn’t know you wanted me to finish the task by myself. I thought we were splitting it up.”

5. Continue Passing the Spindle:
   The spindle continues to be passed around the group, with each person given an equal opportunity to speak without interruptions. Each person takes their turn explaining their side, acknowledging the other person’s perspective, and offering solutions. This structure ensures that no one dominates the conversation, and everyone’s voice is heard.

6. Finding a Resolution:
   After everyone has had a turn to speak, the group works together to find a peaceful resolution to the disagreement. The facilitator (if one is present) or the person who started the conversation can suggest solutions, or the group can collaboratively decide on a way to move forward. This could involve compromises, new agreements, or simple understanding.

7. Ending the Game:
   The game concludes when a resolution is reached, and all participants feel heard and respected. Everyone should have had a chance to express themselves, and the group can agree on a positive course of action or simply come to an understanding.

Example:

• Disagreement: Two children are arguing over who gets to choose the game they play next.

• Step 1: The parent or neutral person introduces the Story Spindle.

• Step 2: Child 1 holds the spindle and calmly explains, “I wanted to play football because it’s my favourite game, and I feel disappointed we didn’t get a chance to play it today.”

• Step 3: Child 2 then holds the spindle and says, “I understand you want to play soccer, but I was really hoping we could try the new board game. I think it would be fun to try something different.”

• Step 4: The parent passes the spindle back and forth between the children until they each understand each other's point of view.

• Step 5: After hearing each other’s perspective, the children could agree to play football first and then try the board game afterward.

Why It’s Fun and Beneficial:

• Promotes active listening: By taking turns holding the Story Spindle, everyone learns to listen more carefully and respond thoughtfully.

• Fosters empathy and understanding: Each person is encouraged to articulate their feelings and thoughts clearly, helping others understand their point of view.

• Reduces conflict: By introducing a fair system where each person speaks without interruption, the Story Spindle helps calm heated situations and reduces the likelihood of arguments escalating.

• Encourages peaceful resolution: The game encourages players to resolve conflicts constructively and collaboratively, fostering a positive atmosphere of cooperation.

The Argument Resolver is a fun yet meaningful way to help children (and adults!) handle disagreements with respect, calmness, and fairness, all while promoting better communication skills in a playful setting.